He IS the White Elephant

Gllen was able to go to one of my holiday gatherings this year because it occurred early. With my Mom's side of the family, our holiday celebration has come to include lots of cocktails, appetizers and the dice game.

In preparation for the party, we stole the Ricketts' Buffalo Chicken dip recipe. Gllen tried to convince me that we needed to make a practice version of it. I denied him. Even without a dress rehearsal, the dip came out delicious. We both ate our fair share and there were no leftovers when we left.

So, other than eating a good portion of dip and drinking about 9 beers, Gllen was pretty quiet. Until the dice game. That's when things got rowdy.

After the first round, Gllen had acquired a good amount of gifts - one being a DIY coloring kit for a velvet poster. He actually seemed excited about it. So, now it was time to steal gifts. With so many treasures to pick from, Gllen turned to me and said, "I know exactly what I'm going for first." I glanced around the room. Could it be the slotted spoon? The carton of Whoppers? The spiral notebook?

When he rolled his first set of doubles, he shouted out, "Sauerkraut!" Yes. Someone had thrown in a can of sauerkraut as a joke, and Gllen had been vying for it from the moment he laid eyes on it. I laughed with the rest of my family. It wasn't until he rolled doubles again and shouted "BEETS!" that I almost died.

I announced the room, "We just broke up. Seriously. It's over." Gllen leapt up and claimed his prize, unconcerned about the status of our relationship. My cousin looked relieved that he had taken it. But now Gllen had, in his opinion, the best gifts there.

No one tried to steal them back from him.