In Which All is Revealed

As we sat outside the Great Dane bar, waiting for a taxi to take our alcohol-soaked butts back to our hotel, Gllen tells me (with a slight slurr) "I understand everything in Wausau right now." He explains, while pointing to the south: "Everyone over there is drunk." Pointing to the north: "Everyone over there is drunk." He gestures to east and west with a circular motion, "And 50% of this is eating cheese."